Talmudblood

Talmud.
Mudblood.
Talmudblood.

Another word for a shiksa.

Unless that's offensive, in which case I take it back.

Hebrew.
Rewind.
Hebrewind.

Ampersandwich

Ampersand.
Sandwich.
Ampersandwich.

A delicious punctuation, the recipe of which is a generous helping of the shift key along with the number 7.

Menu.
Numerical.
Menumerical.

Easy as pie!
(Or even easier, actually. I can't make a pie, but I can do this.)

Recipe.
Period.
Reciperiod.

Lazeye

Lazy.
Eye.
Lazeye.

A lazier way to say it.

Goddamn.
Amblyopia.
Goddamblyopia.

Combozo

Combos.
Bozo.
Combozo.

Some clown who puts things together, like words maybe.

(And perhaps a more appropriate title for this blog, in hindsight.)

Blogger.
Grrrrrrr.
Bloggrrrrrrrr.

Strategypt

Strategy.
Egypt.
Strategypt.

Sometimes I just get words ready for when they're relevant.

If we go to war with Egypt and need a plan, you heard it here first.

Prepared.
A Ridiculous Idea.
Preparidiculous Idea.

Yetymology

Yeti.
Etymology.
Yetymology.

Where did the name "Bigfoot" come from, anyway?

Sure, they probably first identified his existence due to big footprints, but wouldn't they make the assumption that there was a giant creature attached, and not just a big-footed thing that was unremarkable in everything but the foot department?

Why not call him "Big Thing"? (If the name had to be so boring.)

Or at the very least, Bigfeet?
(Weren't there left AND right footprints? Or is that part of the intrigue and mystery of the creature?)

Podiatric.
Tricky.
Podiatricky.

Addictionary

Addict.
Dictionary.
Addictionary.

Someone or something that can't get enough words.

(So they start making up new ones.)

Etymologist.
Gestation.
Etymologestation.

Anagrampa

Anagram.
Grampa.
Anagrampa.

A scrambled-up old man.

Doesn't even spell "grandpa" correctly.

Spelling.
Ingorrect.
Spellingorrect.

Managerk

Manager.
Jerk.
Managerk.

As it applies to the corporate world, this was actually the original meaning and spelling of "manager," but the final letter was simply lost over time.

Unless your supervisor is great, then how about this?

Boss.
Awesome.
Bawesome.


(See also Corporathole.)

Punctuatindependence

Punctuatin'.
Independence.
Punctuatindependence.

A declarative statement ends with a period.

An interrogative one ends with a question mark.

An exclamation ends with an exclamation point.*

Makes one wonder why our country was born with a "Declaration of Independence," when it seems like an exclamation might have been more appropriate.**
(Seems like something that they might have wanted to get more excited about.)

Could have been worse, though.
At least we didn't start our country with an interrogation of independence.

e.g. "Independence, where were you on the evening of July 4, 1776?"

Freedom.
Domination.
Freedomination.


* They got a little lazy on this name, it seems.
Perhaps coming up with the other two was exhausting.

Tired.
Redundant.
Tiredundant.


** The Exclamation of Independence would have started out, "Wheeeeee!, the people..."

Exclaim.
Imagination.
Exclaimagination.

Grouchomsky

Groucho.
Chomsky.
Grouchomsky.

He doesn't care to belong to any linguistics organization that would have him as a member.

Harpo.
Policies.
Harpolicies

(Even though he is one of its founding fathers, along with his brothers: Franz Boppo, Wilhelm von Humbo, and Ferdinand de Saussuro.)

Chico.
Counterparts.
Chicounterparts.

Palindromedary

Palindrome.
Dromedary.
Palindromedary.

Camel-like. Kill'em. Ac!

Llama.
Maul.
Llamaul.*


* This is prevented from being another palindrome (or two) only by the unfortunate arbitrariness of spelling in the English language...

Llama. Mall.
Llamall.

Damn you, homophones!

Traitor.
Orthography.
Traitorthography.


(See also Alpacamel.)

Tofunny

Tofu.
Funny.
Tofunny.

This was the name of the first all-vegan comedy show that took place in Somerville, MA this weekend as part of the AltCom Festival.

Alternative.
Nativity.
Alternativity.*

Thanks to everyone for coming out, and especially for not asking how to pronounce the name of the show out loud (as it's a combo that can really fall apart when not written).

Phonetic.
Etiquette.
Phonetiquette.


* Not that this festival had anything to do with the birth of Jesus (that I know of), but an alternate version of the nativity scene would be one that DIDN'T involve Jesus, just like this festival mostly didn't (that I know of).

Jesus.
Useless.
Jesuseless.

Also, while "AltCom" may be a fine combination, it doesn't quite abide our rules.

Alternative
Comedy.
AltCom.

Pentagrammar

Pentagram.
Grammar.
Pentagrammar.

If you want to summon the devil, it's important to chant the incantation correctly.

That's why so many educated people end up going to hell.

PHD.
Hades.
PHaDes.

Quadricentennialways

Quadricentennial.
Always.
Quadricentennialways.

It's that time again.

The number of posts here is once more divisible by one hundred, and while Blogger may not know the word "quadricentennial," I hold that it is a valid numerical prefix, and Merriam-Webster agrees.

Validity.
Ditto.
Validitto.

So we soldier forth. (Or we soldier four hundredth, actually.)

Here's to the next four-hundred, and the four-hundred after that, and however many it will take before the prefixes get too ridiculous or non-existent to continue this tradition...

Silly.
Ellipses.
Sillipses.

Hermaphroditalics

Hermaphrodite.*
Italics.
Hermaphroditalics.

That person's got man parts AND female parts!

Capital.
Italicized.
Capitalicized.


* Already a combination of Hermes and Aphrodite.
Not too inspired a combo though--if someone wants to deliver that message to the right place.

Hermes.
Messenger.
Hermessenger.

Synonames

Synonym.
Names.
Synonames.

Word combinations where either of the two parts would have sufficed alone:

Happy.
Peachy.
Happeachy.

Pleased to be pleased.

Darren.
Aronofsky.
Darronofsky.

Good for if he had to provide his first and last name in a big hurry.

Rendez-vous.
Voulez-vous coucher avec moi ce soir?
Rendez-voulez vous...

You get the idea.

(See also Guesstimatrix.)

Twinitials

Twin.
Initials.
Twinitials.

People who share the same letters starting their first and last name.

For example, here are some of my (Myq Kaplan's) initial twins:

Mike Katz (a guy I went to college with, not someone I'm making up)

Unimaginary.
A Real Person.
Unimaginareal Person.

Martin Luther King (if you ignore his pesky middle name that no one uses much anyway, right?)

Civic.
Victor.
Civictor.

Mortal Kombat (did I say they had to be people? fine, then this will be the name of my first child*)

Moniker.
Krrrrunch!
Monikerrrunch!

Those are actually the only ones I could come up with. Anyone have other ideas?
Are there no celebrities with just the initials MK? Is it forbidden? Am I forever doomed to a life of simple happiness and productivity on a reasonable and enjoyable scale?

Fulfilment.
Entire.
Fulfilmentire.


* I'm not actually planning on having children, but I very well may change my last name to "Kombat." That couldn't lead to any more spelling konfusion.
e.g. "That's right, it's Myq with a Y and a Q, and Kombat with a K, no, this isn't a prank, hello? Hello? Please, I need my medicine!"
(In this scenario, I am on the phone with some sort of medical provider, it seems.
Which is optimistic about either my future financial situation or prospects for universal health care, or both. Here's hoping, you skeptics!)

Alphabet.
Bitter.
Alphabitter.

Coconutella

Coconut.
Nutella.
Coconutella.

Just an idea for a delicious product.

You're welcome.

If you feel like that idea is too great to take for free, you are welcome to make it up to me however you like.

Recipe.
Reciprocity.
Reciperocity.

Radiorama

Radio.
Diorama.
Radiorama.

I am posting this entry from a radio station (which is a life-sized diorama of a radio station), where I am about to be a guest on the "Keith and the Girl" show.

Keith.
The Girl.
Keithe Girl.

Or if you are reading this too far into the future such that what I just wrote describes what happened previously rather than what is to happen soon, then please mentally adjust the above tense usage accordingly.

Refute.
Future.
Refuture.

For I am not ALWAYS in a state of "about to be a guest" on this show.

Unless you consider the grand scheme of the universe, with the passage of time in the life of a human being relatively minuscule, in which case perhaps I am.

Continual.
Always.
Continualways.

Plus, you can listen to the show any time on the internet. So I am even more definitely always about to be on the radio, to listeners who want to put the world wide work in.

Internet.
Never-Ending.
Internever-Ending.