History.
Repeat.
Historepeat.
They say that not knowing history will lead to repeating it.
But what about the parts that we WANT to repeat? Shouldn't we try and not know them?
Stop teaching about Gandhi and Martin Luther King and Einstein and Thomas Edison and Darwin!
Once we've forgotten all about them, we'll have new ones!
Maybe a Voltron combining them all: a peaceful time-traveling inspirational inventor!
(With the head of a lion! And arms that are also the heads of lions! But that used to be the heads of monkeys! Go Voltron!)
Evolve.
Voltron.
Evolvtron.
Showing posts with label MLK. Show all posts
Showing posts with label MLK. Show all posts
Monday, October 19, 2009
Friday, May 15, 2009
Sorrizona
Sorry.
Arizona.
Sorrizona.
I went on ABC News Now earlier today. So not now anymore. Before. I went on ABC News Now before. Understand?
They asked me about ASU's decision not to give Obama an honorary degree, and how I felt about it, because he seemed fine with it.
My girlfriend is actually from Arizona and, in preparation for my appearance (before Now, or before then, if you will), told me that Arizona was one of the last states to recognize MLK's birthday as a holiday, and then only because they were afraid they couldn't have the Superbowl if they didn't.
That said, she pointed out that it's difficult to get an honorary degree if you don't have any honor.
So, she said that before Now, so that I could say it on Now, and now that it's later (after Now), I just wanted to clear something up, because the person interviewing me said "ouch" and apologized to their Arizona listeners.
And I wanted to apologize for a couple things:
1) For saying on air "no offense," because that's lame.
2) For NOT saying on air that this point had come from a smart person FROM Arizona.
3) For not having a third thing to apologize for.
4) For creating a paradox that may destroy the universe but hasn't yet, it seems.
That's all.
ASU.
Sucka.
A SUcka.
(Seriously, no offense.)
Arizona.
Sorrizona.
I went on ABC News Now earlier today. So not now anymore. Before. I went on ABC News Now before. Understand?
They asked me about ASU's decision not to give Obama an honorary degree, and how I felt about it, because he seemed fine with it.
My girlfriend is actually from Arizona and, in preparation for my appearance (before Now, or before then, if you will), told me that Arizona was one of the last states to recognize MLK's birthday as a holiday, and then only because they were afraid they couldn't have the Superbowl if they didn't.
That said, she pointed out that it's difficult to get an honorary degree if you don't have any honor.
So, she said that before Now, so that I could say it on Now, and now that it's later (after Now), I just wanted to clear something up, because the person interviewing me said "ouch" and apologized to their Arizona listeners.
And I wanted to apologize for a couple things:
1) For saying on air "no offense," because that's lame.
2) For NOT saying on air that this point had come from a smart person FROM Arizona.
3) For not having a third thing to apologize for.
4) For creating a paradox that may destroy the universe but hasn't yet, it seems.
That's all.
ASU.
Sucka.
A SUcka.
(Seriously, no offense.)
Monday, March 30, 2009
Twinitials
Twin.
Initials.
Twinitials.
People who share the same letters starting their first and last name.
For example, here are some of my (Myq Kaplan's) initial twins:
Mike Katz (a guy I went to college with, not someone I'm making up)
Unimaginary.
A Real Person.
Unimaginareal Person.
Martin Luther King (if you ignore his pesky middle name that no one uses much anyway, right?)
Civic.
Victor.
Civictor.
Mortal Kombat (did I say they had to be people? fine, then this will be the name of my first child*)
Moniker.
Krrrrunch!
Monikerrrunch!
Those are actually the only ones I could come up with. Anyone have other ideas?
Are there no celebrities with just the initials MK? Is it forbidden? Am I forever doomed to a life of simple happiness and productivity on a reasonable and enjoyable scale?
Fulfilment.
Entire.
Fulfilmentire.
* I'm not actually planning on having children, but I very well may change my last name to "Kombat." That couldn't lead to any more spelling konfusion.
e.g. "That's right, it's Myq with a Y and a Q, and Kombat with a K, no, this isn't a prank, hello? Hello? Please, I need my medicine!"
(In this scenario, I am on the phone with some sort of medical provider, it seems.
Which is optimistic about either my future financial situation or prospects for universal health care, or both. Here's hoping, you skeptics!)
Alphabet.
Bitter.
Alphabitter.
Initials.
Twinitials.
People who share the same letters starting their first and last name.
For example, here are some of my (Myq Kaplan's) initial twins:
Mike Katz (a guy I went to college with, not someone I'm making up)
Unimaginary.
A Real Person.
Unimaginareal Person.
Martin Luther King (if you ignore his pesky middle name that no one uses much anyway, right?)
Civic.
Victor.
Civictor.
Mortal Kombat (did I say they had to be people? fine, then this will be the name of my first child*)
Moniker.
Krrrrunch!
Monikerrrunch!
Those are actually the only ones I could come up with. Anyone have other ideas?
Are there no celebrities with just the initials MK? Is it forbidden? Am I forever doomed to a life of simple happiness and productivity on a reasonable and enjoyable scale?
Fulfilment.
Entire.
Fulfilmentire.
* I'm not actually planning on having children, but I very well may change my last name to "Kombat." That couldn't lead to any more spelling konfusion.
e.g. "That's right, it's Myq with a Y and a Q, and Kombat with a K, no, this isn't a prank, hello? Hello? Please, I need my medicine!"
(In this scenario, I am on the phone with some sort of medical provider, it seems.
Which is optimistic about either my future financial situation or prospects for universal health care, or both. Here's hoping, you skeptics!)
Alphabet.
Bitter.
Alphabitter.
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