Sunday, June 21, 2009

Patriarchenemy

Patriarch.
Archenemy.
Patriarchenemy.

To some, another word for father.*
(Not me! Happy Fathers' Day!)

Holiday.
Dad.
Holidad.

I had breakfast with my father for Fathers' Day today, and then lunch with my mother for her birthday tomorrow.**

Family.
Eating.
Famileating.

At lunch, a friend of my grandmother's told me about how he orders a tuna sandwich when he's out at restaurants.

First, he asks if the tuna is fresh, and they say "Of course."

Then, he tells them he actually prefers it if it's three or four days old, do they have any of that around?

If they say, "No, only fresh tuna," he says, "All right, I can deal with that."

If they say, "Yes, we have some of that," he says, "I'll have the egg salad."

Chicken.
Kinship.
Chickinship.


* To others, another word for matriarch?

Maternal.
Alright.
Maternalright.


** Her birthday is tomorrow, but we had lunch for it today.

I was not reporting on future events.

Those are secrets.

Chronology.
Conspiracy.
Chronspiracy.

4 comments:

  1. Joel Steinberg.
    George Steinbrenner.
    Georel Steinbrennerberg.
    Go Yankees you dumb bitch.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I don't know that I see the connection to the original post, but thanks for your contribution!

    Irrelevant.
    Antics.
    Irrelevantics.

    ReplyDelete
  3. My mother's birthday was Friday.

    Yeah, I know, boring.

    ReplyDelete
  4. But relevant!

    Dull.
    Delightful.
    Dullightful.

    ReplyDelete