Hardcover.
Overboard.
Hardcoverboard.
When a book is first released as a hardback, that uses much more paper than if it were released initially as a softcover.
Then, even more paper is wasted when the paperback comes out.
If I have my way, I will turn the literary world upside-down by releasing the smaller, softer, more environmentally friendly version of books right away.
THEN, if people really hate the environment, they can special-order extra-large hard-backed versions of the book a year later.
(If you hate, you have to wait. That will be this program's catchphrase.)
Paperback.
Backwards.
Paperbackwards.
Sunday, May 3, 2009
Hearsayonara
Hearsay.
Sayonara.
Hearsayonara.
Gossip of an unverified good-bye.
Rumor.
Arrivederci.
Rumorrivederci.
Sayonara.
Hearsayonara.
Gossip of an unverified good-bye.
Rumor.
Arrivederci.
Rumorrivederci.
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Pentagrammar
Pentagram.
Grammar.
Pentagrammar.
If you want to summon the devil, it's important to chant the incantation correctly.
That's why so many educated people end up going to hell.
PHD.
Hades.
PHaDes.
Grammar.
Pentagrammar.
If you want to summon the devil, it's important to chant the incantation correctly.
That's why so many educated people end up going to hell.
PHD.
Hades.
PHaDes.
Promenada
Promenade.
Nada.
Promenada.
At 3am today, I performed for a comedy club full of kids who had just come from their high school proms. Exciting!
Dance.
Antsy.
Dantsy.
You see, comedy clubs provide an important service: preventing underage drinking and providing a late-night venue for these kids that is not a hotel room.
Marriott.
Riotous.
Marriottous.
Because teenagers having sex is usually just a last resort activity, after all possible comedy options have been exhausted, when they just end up settling for some wacky bedroom antics which follow the less hilarious opening act of the hotel staff.*
Bellhop.
Hopeless.
Bellhopeless.
So I did my duty today in the fight against teen pregnancy.
Unless you count my impregnating them with a laughter fetus that incubated immediately and repeatedly.
Talk about hysterical pregnancies. (Boom.)
Guffaw.
Awesome.
Guffawesome.
* Hotel "staff" not at all intended to be a play on words that could imply the hotel staff are being inappropriate with the children.
Unless there are hotels running secret child sex rings (then pun coincidentally intended).
Brothel.
Hilton.
Brothilton.
Nada.
Promenada.
At 3am today, I performed for a comedy club full of kids who had just come from their high school proms. Exciting!
Dance.
Antsy.
Dantsy.
You see, comedy clubs provide an important service: preventing underage drinking and providing a late-night venue for these kids that is not a hotel room.
Marriott.
Riotous.
Marriottous.
Because teenagers having sex is usually just a last resort activity, after all possible comedy options have been exhausted, when they just end up settling for some wacky bedroom antics which follow the less hilarious opening act of the hotel staff.*
Bellhop.
Hopeless.
Bellhopeless.
So I did my duty today in the fight against teen pregnancy.
Unless you count my impregnating them with a laughter fetus that incubated immediately and repeatedly.
Talk about hysterical pregnancies. (Boom.)
Guffaw.
Awesome.
Guffawesome.
* Hotel "staff" not at all intended to be a play on words that could imply the hotel staff are being inappropriate with the children.
Unless there are hotels running secret child sex rings (then pun coincidentally intended).
Brothel.
Hilton.
Brothilton.
Friday, May 1, 2009
Cerebellumberjack
Cerebellum.
Lumberjack.
Cerebellumberjack.
A guy who uses his head to chop down trees.
Bunyan.
Analysis.
Bunyanalysis.
Lumberjack.
Cerebellumberjack.
A guy who uses his head to chop down trees.
Bunyan.
Analysis.
Bunyanalysis.
Marathong
Marathon.
Thong.
Marathong.
Poor choice of garment for a race that long.
Underwear.
Weary.
Underweary.
Thong.
Marathong.
Poor choice of garment for a race that long.
Underwear.
Weary.
Underweary.
Nevadamant
Nevada.
Adamant.
Nevadamant.
The governor there has vowed to veto domestic partnership legislation.
I vow to veto that governor. (If that means anything.)
Veto.
Tool.
Vetool.
Adamant.
Nevadamant.
The governor there has vowed to veto domestic partnership legislation.
I vow to veto that governor. (If that means anything.)
Veto.
Tool.
Vetool.
Nymphomercial
Nympho.
Infomercial.
Nymphomercial.
The kind of ad they run really late at night.
(Generally geared towards people who are up and busy not being in a relationship.)
Advertising.
Single.
Advertisingle.
Infomercial.
Nymphomercial.
The kind of ad they run really late at night.
(Generally geared towards people who are up and busy not being in a relationship.)
Advertising.
Single.
Advertisingle.
Chlamydiamonds
Chlamydia.
Diamonds.
Chlamydiamonds.
NOT a girl's best friend.
(Nor man's best friend. That's a dog.
Ideally a dog with no STDs either.)
Canine.
Infected.
Caninfected.
Diamonds.
Chlamydiamonds.
NOT a girl's best friend.
(Nor man's best friend. That's a dog.
Ideally a dog with no STDs either.)
Canine.
Infected.
Caninfected.
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