Sorrizona

Sorry.
Arizona.
Sorrizona.

I went on ABC News Now earlier today. So not now anymore. Before. I went on ABC News Now before. Understand?

They asked me about ASU's decision not to give Obama an honorary degree, and how I felt about it, because he seemed fine with it.

My girlfriend is actually from Arizona and, in preparation for my appearance (before Now, or before then, if you will), told me that Arizona was one of the last states to recognize MLK's birthday as a holiday, and then only because they were afraid they couldn't have the Superbowl if they didn't.

That said, she pointed out that it's difficult to get an honorary degree if you don't have any honor.

So, she said that before Now, so that I could say it on Now, and now that it's later (after Now), I just wanted to clear something up, because the person interviewing me said "ouch" and apologized to their Arizona listeners.

And I wanted to apologize for a couple things:

1) For saying on air "no offense," because that's lame.
2) For NOT saying on air that this point had come from a smart person FROM Arizona.
3) For not having a third thing to apologize for.
4) For creating a paradox that may destroy the universe but hasn't yet, it seems.

That's all.

ASU.
Sucka.
A SUcka.

(Seriously, no offense.)

Furnuturing

Furniture.
Nurturing.
Furnurturing.

My girlfriend rearranged our furniture while I was away this weekend.

AND she told me about it, so I wouldn't hurt myself when walking into the apartment.*

She loves me!

Feng Shui.
Sweetheart.
Feng Shweetheart.


* Not that she put a big spike face-level at the entryway.

Or rigged paint cans to attack if an unsuspecting burglar or boyfriend tried to get in.

She just made some genius decisions about where to put a couch and chairs to get much better usage out of our space than we were previously achieving with less motivated decisions about where to leave piles of paper and clothing.

Home Sweet Home.
Home Alone.
Home Sweet Home Alone.**


** Except not alone, together. We live together.

(See also Unkempty.)

Triankle

Triangle
Ankle.
Triankle.

A triangular ankle.

Sometimes they write themselves.
(And sometimes your girlfriend writes them for you.)